So I did SCP-something-J thingtem #: SCP-9-JObject Class: EnochianSpecial Containment Procedures: SCP-9-J is to be kept in a french fries-lined containment chamber located in Site 19, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 4 playing video games armed with hotdogs.In the event that SCP-9-J ever begins fucking its ass, no is to hit SCP-9-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force θ-7 (''Megas XLR'') is to be dispatched to SCP-9-J's last known location.Description: SCP-9-J is a horrible dog. Like most members of its species, it is able to fly duck, and regularly eats twice its own weight in french fries each day.SCP-9-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with moose, which causes it to turn into man. Whenever this happens, all Mice within a 12 kilometer radius will begin to [REDACTED] uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties.In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to General MacDouglas.
Arthuurs reveals the truthArthuurs: MY ANUS IS BLEEDING BUT I DENY EVERYTHING BECAUSE I LIKE DICKS